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themadhannibal:

Why do my parents yell at me for not fucking cleaning my room like I could be out doing crystal fucking meth and banging 7 people at once but all I do is run a blog, watch movies, eat food, use the bathroom and occasionally ask them to drive me somewhere I’m not that hard to care for. 

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beckie0:

simfected:

maythedownforcebewithyou:

myurlistoolong:

thefrogman:

A news station was interviewing a man who lived near a dangerous intersection. It is known for an inordinate number of car crashes.

HE JUST KIND OF STEPS BACK
“oh see there you go son”

BALLS OF NONCHALANT STEEL

“See, now this is the kinda shit I’m talking about…”

Woah.
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colorado-wannabe:

So in English class we had to draw a scene from The Great Gatsby. After the drawings were done the teacher was showing them to the class, and one drawing was a pic of Gatsby reaching towards at the green light, but in the drawing Gatsby didn’t have hands. So my teacher starts saying something like how this picture has hidden meaning and portrays the helplessness Gatsby feels, and the kid next to me just casually says “I can’t draw hands.”

t-ranquilize:

I will never fall out of love with this photo

epic-humor:

haithinkimfunny:

queenestelle:

gothist:

GET IGNORED SO MUCH BITCHES CALL ME TERMS AND CONDITIONS

at least you get accepted no matter what

that’s the most uplifting thing i’ve seen all day 

see more

the-absolute-funniest-posts:

onehundredandfivenorthtower:
I have been enlightened
jimb0slyf3:

This should be a top news story.